In honour of Valentines day we have found a twitter bot that mashes together romance novel excerpts and dank video game memes. Try sending one to your crush and see what happens. Here are a few of our favourites to get you in the mood. You’re welcome.
For a moment, he wondered what would happen if he leaned down and took those full pink lips for the kiss he’d wanted to give her since day had broken. But before he could act, she whispered, “I can’t rocket jump.”
He wrapped her in his arms, pulling her tightly against him, loving the way she felt, soft where he was hard, silk where he was steel. When she finally pulled back from the kiss, her lips, swollen and pink, parted sweetly and curved around her words. “It’s hiiiiiigh noon!”
He was very close. Too close, leaning in, lowering his voice to a whisper, the breath of his words against the arch of her cheek heightening her nervousness. She did not breathe, too focused on what he would say next. “Press down on the D-pad.”
He approached her, his voice taking on a seductive tenor. “Registered to the Pokedex.”
Time slowed as he savored the feel of her against him, the warmth of her in his arms, the scent of her trapping his thoughts. He closed his eyes and whispered, “You fight like a dairy farmer.”
He lifted her chin and pressed a single, soft kiss on her lips, trying not to notice when she leaned into the touch, when she breathed a little sigh as he lifted his head a touch. “It’s not a ROM hack.”